Thursday, May 24, 2012

What Dreams May Come. And Crafts.

I've been having nightmares about the wedding every night for the last two weeks or so.  These aren't nightmares that exhibit cold feet or nerves about ME marrying B1 but rather him marrying me.  In most of the dreams, he's figured out that he doesn't want to marry me so he leaves and marries someone else.  In some dreams, we're getting married but there is a mix up and we end up accidentally marrying the wrong people.

I often wake myself up by my whimpering and I feel sad and lonely.  B1's laying next to me peacefully sleeping, so I just kiss him softly on his shoulder and thank God that it was only a dream.  But in the back of my head, I say, "Please don't ever leave me."

I have nothing to worry about.  I know this in my awake state.  But deep down, I'm obviously worried about losing him.  At some point, I have to believe, I'll get over the being left syndrome and just be secure.  Right?

In last nights dream I was preparing for my wedding...getting my dress settled, figuring out my hair-just like I am in real life.  My fiance and I decided to buy a house, and I was to meet him at the place in question so we could look at it.  When I heard that it was a condo, I started to panic.  B1 hates condos and would never buy one.  I thought it was odd, but went with it because maybe this one overlooked the ocean or something...but when I arrived, I saw that it was not B1-it was someone else.  Someone I haven't ever met in real life.

I knew he wasn't the person I wanted to marry.  So I played along until I was alone and I searched and searched for my B1.  When I saw him, my heart swelled and I knew.  But he was with someone else too.  So I had to convince him that we should marry each other and ditch the people we were with.

I woke up before I found out whether or not he picked me.  Which goes along with the theme of these dreams, I suppose.  But I remember feeling worried that I'd end up without him.

Maybe these dreams are stemming from the fact that we're coming down to crunch time and I want everything to be perfect.  If I pair that with the fear of losing the bestest man ever, they make sense.  I just wish that my dreams would go to the happy place instead-because in real life, I'm happy and excited.  And I KNOW B1 is too.  I know this because he tells me all of the time.  So I dunno-I guess it's just my subconscious working itself out.  What do you think?

In happy/fun wedding planning news, I just purchased the return address labels for the invitations.  They have a special logo with our last name on them that a friend made for us.  It's pretty cool-has an anchor and a ships wheel combined.  I wish I could should you, but I don't want to broadcast our last name.

I also finished one major section of our invitations and am working on the smaller details now.  Soon it'll be ready to print the inserts and address the envelopes.  I have a lot of knots to tie first though.  Did I show you the finished product?

That's the knot we're tying at our ceremony instead of a sand pouring or candle lighting.  The coloring is off here, but it's navy and coral, which are our colors.

Oh!  I found two lobster buoys too!  Finally.  I have been obsessed with finding two authentic wooden lobster buoys that aren't huge.  Sadly I can't afford authentic ones, but I found a REALLY good knockoff on Etsy.  She's even going to custom paint them for me.  One will be navy with a coral and a white stripe and the other will be coral with a navy and a white strips.  I'm going to hang them from our chairs at the sweetheart table.  I am thinking of stenciling "bride" and "groom" on them.  But I don't want to be overly cheesy, so we'll see.

Down to the fun details now-lots of craft projects going on...gotta get them finished soon so that I don't have to waste pretty weather inside!

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

When asked to go get the cold cuts from the deli counter, B1 knows to order baked ham, not boiled ham.  "Life's too short to eat boiled ham." he said.

It's the little things...

This weekend we passed by a carnival while on our way home.  The following night, we were stuck to the side of a spinning wall while the floor dropped out from under us.  Afterward, we shared a fried dough.  B1 one smiled at me and laughed as he brushed the powdered sugar off of my nose for me.

It's been pretty yucky here lately.  The weather has been gray and rainy and the temperature hasn't been very warm at all.  Today though, the sun came out.

I had a hot dog with sauerkraut for lunch at the president's picnic at work.  I ate my first slice of watermelon of the season.

On my real break, I went to the opening day of my city's farmers market.  I bought these beauties:

...along with a small basil plant, a small rosemary plant and a huge bunch of kale.  I can't wait to make kale chips later.

Before I went back to work, I swung by our marina.  There was a chance that the boat was going to be dropped into the water yesterday, but we didn't know for sure because we are waiting on one piece of paperwork.

See that crane below?  That's where our boat spent the winter...and it's now in the water!!

 This will be our last season with this boat.  B1's planning on putting it up for sale at the end of the summer so that we can move forward with buying our new boat/home after the wedding in September.  I'm so excited that we'll get to spend Memorial Day floating on the boat.  Even if we don't sail on Monday, we'll be there.

Even just sitting on the boat is wonderful.  Especially when I look to my right and see B1's beautiful face.

When I came home, I decided that I couldn't let those wonderful eggs just sit in the fridge getting  day older.  I decided to make an omelet for dinner.  I added fresh asparagus, cherry tomatoes, baked ham slices and feta.  Then I finished it with the fresh chopped basil.

Holy cow.  Delicious.  I didn't want it to end...

Tracking back to last week, I had dinner with a friend on Friday.  We went out to a little local Mexican joint and shared a pitcher of margaritas and lots of laughs.  The service was horrendous which added to the hilarity.  After dinner, we walked across the street to a bakery for dessert.  

I'm more of a cheese girl than a chocolate girl, but there's just something about pastries in a bakery that calls my name.  They're all so pretty and lined up so nicely.  I brought B1 home a lobster tail and I got myself a coconut macaroon topped with chocolate and a soft amaretti cookie.  That cookie was out of this world!  I haven't had one in a long time and it was well worth the calories.  I could have eating 100.

So there you have life isn't all wedding related.  Though-the reason I'm so happy is generally because of the man I'm lucky enough to be marrying...but it's not all wedding.  :)