Friday, May 21, 2010

Titles R So Hard 2 Come Up With...

...especially when you're in love.

When I got out of the shower this morning, I dried myself off as usual and turned to the vanity to begin my daily routine. Just as I was about to swipe my towel over the middle section of the mirror (it has 3 "sections") I noticed something on the 2 sides flanking it: hearts. Yesterday morning after his shower he drew 3 hearts on each side of the mirror so that when I showered today, they would appear.

How freakin' cute is he?

Luckily he came over last night too, so this morning I was able to thank him in person. He's the stuff dreams are made of...last night (this morning?) while we were lying in bed talking before falling asleep I said that we just need to take one year off together just so we could do this without having to worry about work, or bills, or anything else, really. Just B1 and me, playing our way through the year. If I were rich, we'd totally be doing that.

I just left him 1 hour ago and am counting the minutes until I see him tomorrow night. OMG-how is life this good? How could I have lived the last-wow-10 years-without feeling this way? How is it that I have found a boy who is just as silly and goofy and geeky about us as I am? I feel like I am wrapped up in a big fluffy cloud and that I am floating on air. *sigh* :)

Something really hit me last night when he was over. I am completely myself with him. Perhaps it's because we met in a non-dating sort of platform and we both were not expecting to meet anyone so we didn't try to be anything we weren't that night. I suspect, though, that it's more about how well we "fit". Last night I playfully punched B1 in the tummy while he was stretching and while doing it, I made a little noise. Now while my sisters will not think that this is weird in any way, most of my current friends would probably look at me funny for doing this. B1 didn't even bat one gorgeous eyelash-he just made a comment about how that was a cheap shot and gave me a hug. And when I do weird things or tell him about another one of my bazillion quirks, he smiles, laughs with me and hugs me. It's most likely followed up with a series of rapid fire kisses all over my face or neck-which is also something that I have always love doing (I actually do this with Rye Bread all of the time) but haven't done with a boyfriend since college. I'm me with him, and he thinks I am pretty great.

It takes no effort to be with him, no thought, no worry, no "what ifs". This is how it is supposed to be...

Switching gears...
I have decided to move. I really hate to do it because I will have to borrow more money from my father for the deposit and I really love the space I am in now. It's so homey and spread out and really, perfect for me right now. The trouble is, my landlord is an asshole. And I won't put up with it any longer. He treats me like I'm some stupid little girl who is ridiculous for asking him to fix things. He tells me lies to pacify me and then gives me excuses when I call him on it or site dates and times. Monday he told me to "just relax" when I asked him to tell me if he honestly was going to fix the roof so that my ceiling would stop leaking-because it was again-and he's known about the problem for 2 months. Incidentally, my neighbor has told me that his ceiling has been leaking for over a year and that the landlord is "useless".

And so instead of waiting to find out what happens when something major breaks or having to deal with him for any other reason at all, I am leaving. I have no lease so it is easily done. He does have my last months rent and knowing how lackadaisical he is about everything else, I don't feel like trying to fight with him about getting it back if I move out now. I'll move July 15th. Instead of a check on June 15th, he'll get a letter telling him that I am moving and that he already has last months rent. I'd like to add "Go fuck yourself" to the end of the note, but that wouldn't be very ladylike, now would it?

The good news about this is that while I love my apartment and the parking space, I was never really thrilled about how far away from the city I am. Even though it's only 15 minutes or so by car, I am not near public transportation (well, I am, but I don't feel comfortable walking to it at night here). I don't feel the same vibe here as I did in the city, for obvious reasons, but still. My neighbor is a 70 year old man and his wife. And while they are both lovely, I'm just not ready to be that much of an adult yet.

I'm looking in and directly around the city now. And because I have so much time, hopefully I'll find just the right place. And this time, I have my own cute boy to help me. :)

Thursday, May 20, 2010


I've been sitting here at the computer for a little bit trying to think of stories I can tell you or things that are going on but the only thing I can think about is B1. He consumes every thought, every breath...

It makes for boring blogging but an oh-so-wonderful life...

Maybe I'll be able to focus more later. Right now I'm still wrapped up in B1 hugs and kisses and nuzzles.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010


The cutest boy ever asked me this question yesterday: "Is it OK if I use our picture as my profile picture? I wanted to ask 1st." Cutest boy EVER.

B1 thinks HE'S the lucky one. How does him coming over to his sick girlfriends house (who he's only been dating for 2 months) at 6:30pm on a Sunday night to take care of her make him the lucky one? (Incidentally, that was the 2nd time he came over to take care of me.)

He's good at taking care of me too. He made me drink water, checked my temperature every couple of hours (b/c it was up to 103.8 at one point) and made me eat saltines because I didn't have any food in me. Oh, and he stayed in bed by my side but didn't grope me or touch me too much.

Yes, I love him.

Just because you have strep throat doesn't mean your throat will actually hurt. Mine didn't and I had it for almost a week.

Eating a donut on the first day without a fever isn't necessarily a smart idea. But it sure does taste yummy.

Being someones only single friend and then having that taken away really sucks for the other person and I feel bad that I'm so happy around her. Yesterday she told me she was fighting back tears all day because everyone around her is married, engaged or blissfully happy and she's still stuck in the same place she was 10 years ago. No words make that feel better...

Is it wrong that when my dad needed batteries for the remote control for my new TV that the only ones I had were in the top drawer in my bedroom?

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Love Came Softly

In junior high I read a book about a mother who was dying of cancer. I think it switched back and forth from her point of view to her daughters point of view. It was a very moving and sad book but I really loved it. Ironically, I can't remember the name of it. In any event, the mother in the book wrote poetry. Some were weird, but this one always stuck in my head. And recently, it's really been present.

Love came softly, lowered its head

you are my desire, come to my bed.

Once followed and old road

and once round the bend



Last week B1 told me that he is really enjoying becoming closer to me and that he understands that it'll take me time to get used to him and us. He told me to take my time and to be myself, because he's already mine. After this week-especially Sunday when he came right over and took such good care of me-I really feel no need to hold anything back from him. He's here. I'm here. He's so wonderful and I feel comfortable with him and I trust him and holding back would just be silly at this point.

I can't wait to see him.

Toosdae ?'s

I woke up this morning sweaty and weak but amazingly enough for the first time since Sunday morning, I do not have a fever. I'm still home today and am hoping that this is the end. Yesterday I had a few "this is it" moments, but this time I REALLY hope it's it! I'm also waiting on test results from the doctor...if there is something wrong, I'm very anxious to get some meds in me to kick this thing! This weeks questions are inspired by the many , many prom pictures I've seen on facebook this week.

1. Was your prom in your high school gym or at a restaurant?

2. Did your prom have a theme or a song? If so, what was it?

3. Did you rent a limo for your prom?

1. Both of my proms were in restaurants. Our principal tried to make us have our junior prom in the gym but we fought back hard and somehow won.

2. I remember that my junior prom was "In Your Eyes" but I can't remember what the senior prom was. Which is bad because I was the chair of the prom committee both years.

3. Nope. There is no way I could afford that and my parents weren't going to spring for that so we drove in our own cars...which was actually OK.

Monday, May 17, 2010

Temperature Control

Dinner on Saturday was perfect. The dining room was lit up with candles and he loved every bite of the food. We sat and talked and just enjoyed each others company. After, we moved the candles into the living room and watched a movie.

Sunday was supposed to be a big day. Weeks ago, he invited me to be his date for a friends birthday party. I was so excited to meet people and to be his date but when I woke up, I didn't feel well again. I tried to push through the pain, but half way through my breakfast I just got up and went back to bed. B1 came in and asked if I was OK and I had to tell him no. I started getting chills so I took my temperature-it was 102. I got sick once, right after that and before going to the party, B1 went to the store and got me saltines and ginger ale. I slept for about 5 hours when I woke up my temperature was at 103.8!

I started to get worried. I stood up and was delirious and dizzy and I didn't know where my phone was right away. I didn't know if I should call 911 or if I was over reacting. I took some Tylenol and drank some ginger ale and layed back down. Luckily, B1 text messaged me to see how I was doing and I found my phone. I told him where my temp was and he immediately said he was coming over. I felt horrible having him come over again to take care of me, but he insisted. When he got here he made me drink water and eat some saltines and he just layed beside me making sure I was OK. He asked me if I am allergic to any medication and if he did take me to the hospital would I like him to call someone.

Luckily, it didn't come to that-but all night my temperature was between 100 and 102. It finally broke this morning around 6:30. I feel 1000 times better than I did yesterday but my stomach is a little achy and I have a headache. My heart though, is wonderful.

How have I gotten so lucky to have found a man who cares this much about me to come take care of me after only 2 months of dating? I mean, really. He is the most amazing man. I think I thanked God no less the 20 times last night.

Today I'm staying home again. If my temperature goes up again I will go to the doctor. But as of right now, it's stayed down and hopefully I'm past whatever it was that kept it up.