Friday, April 23, 2010

Date Night

I have a really nice date tonight...walking around the city, no plans...holding hands and just exploring and ending up wherever we end up.

If I haven't given you a *sigh* :) lately...

*sigh* :)

I haven't held hands with a boy in about 4 1/2 years. I think I'm most excited about that...imagine-a boy who's not ashamed to show people he cares about me. :)

Thursday, April 22, 2010

And Then It Hit Me

You know what? My life is pretty sweet. And you know what? Even last year at my lowest point, it was pretty darned good too. I am amazed-absolutely amazed-at where I am in life. Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined that I would have reinvented myself not once but twice...and that really, the reason I was able to do that was because of one thing:

I am brave.

People have been telling me this for a long time. They admire the fact that I up and moved to Florida without knowing anyone and then again when I moved here to Boston. For years I didn't see it that way. I saw it as running away.

I auditioned for Disney because I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 years and we went to the same small New England college. And while I moved to Boston for several reasons, one of them was to try to break away from a relationship that was very broken yet addicting. I thought I was a coward.

Then the other day I looked at my calendar. It's full. With lunch and dinner dates, plays that my friends produce, gallery openings and dinner parties. On Monday, I had 3 people call me to see if I could do something with them. People think that I am a nice, caring, creative and talented person who they can depend on. I know this because they tell me so.

I did this. I sat in my house in CT and told myself that too many bad things happened there. I told myself that things would not change with Greg and that the only way I could move past it was to create new memories and put distance between us. I had 2 friends in CT. Really, only 2 people I could call to do things with. Both of them were good friends to me-one of them still is-but the point is, I felt like I was missing out on something-like I had all of this stuff to give but no one to give it to. So I came here. I set up a home, I explored, I sought out new friendships. I went out on a limb, did things that I had never done before and was open to new experiences. I learned. I grew. And I became stronger.

And I realized, just tonight, for the first time that I did not run from anything. I ran to it...I created a new life.

This post was inspired by my old poems on the sidebar. I was glancing through a few of them and smiled at the fact that I was preparing myself for this moment...and suddenly everything came together....

Boccaccini's in my hand
and covered all in oil...
New beginnings on the verge
and soft, defrosting soil.
Ins and outs and ups and downs
and everything in between...
It's very close, I can feel it now,
I can wipe my own slate clean.
New beginnings clad in white
though not the white of dreams...
Instead the white I wear these days
is covered in butter creams.
117 days are left
in a school with pots and pans...
and when those days expire, friends,
I'll be free to travel the lands.
What will I do, where will I go
and who will wonder why?
It's up to me to find my path,
my only limit? The sky.*

*Original Poem entitled "Curd" posted on March 30, 2006.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

(OK..not so)Randomivity

*sigh* :)

"So...Not a fan of Pink?"..."No. I'm not a fan of glitter!"

Hearing that any night he gets to sit close to me is a good night just makes me feel special.

Sometimes you just can't get out of a parking lot because you're blushing too much.

Having a friend ask what's up because you look happy is an amazing feeling.

I have amazing friends. Yes, you are included in that statement.

My chiropractor is quirky but lovely. I didn't like him at first, but he's a really funny, nice man. He's happy with my progress and I'm happy with that diagnosis.

It's wonderful to hear about how a cute boy went from thinking you were just going to be friends to "Yeah...who was I kidding? I saw you and that was it." is just awesome.

Being told that you're a really good painter is nice...unless it's from a 7 year old boy who continues to stare at you all day. Little creeper!

I'm really grasping here to find something else to include in this randomivity post beside B1. But...well...he is kind of consuming my thoughts these days. :)

*sigh* :)

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Toosdae ?'s

If there were a cloud higher than 9, I'd be on it. It has been a wonderful, wonderful (wonderful) weekend. If the sun is shining where you are, I can tell you that most of its power is coming from my smile. My cheeks hurt. I'm blushing. I'm giggling. B1 is for sure a nice cute boy. I know where I stand with him. I know what he's thinking. I know that he likes me. He took a picture with me (happily) on our 2nd date. Life is good...*sigh*

1. Do you blow dry your hair or just let it air dry?

2. What is your favorite midnight snack?

3. Have you ever thrown up in a car? How about on a plane?

My answers:
1. I almost always blow dry my hair because if I don't, it gets frizzy and unmanageable. I wish I could just wash and go, but I can't.

2. Hmm...if I have it, cold pizza. If not, then I'd say cheese. Of any sort.

3. I can not remember ever throwing up in a car. I know that I have had to pull over to get sick, but actually getting sick in the car, I don't think so...I have been sick on a plane, when I was little.

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Rye Bread's 8th Birthday

As you know, every year I make a special birthday cake for my niece Rye Bread. Though she doesn't quite understand just how much work goes into these special cakes now, I have no doubt that when I'm gone one day, she'll look at the pictures and know just how much love I put into them. She is proud of them, I know that. She paraded her friends into the house today and bragged that her Aunt made this and that the bird was cake too!

Over all, the cakes took about 24 hours and lots of money. At 11pm Saturday night I had to give up and put the bird back in the freezer to set because the head and beak were falling apart. I worried that when I opened the freezer in the morning all I would have left would be a body-but luckily it was fine and it stayed put all throughout the party.

Until one little girl knocked into the table and make it tumble to the ground, smashing all over the place. But, don't worry-it was AFTER we had it was OK. Here is the picture trail. Not as many "during" photos this year as I was running out of time...

The Cake Stand

Frozen stacked cakes, ready for carving.

Beach Cake-unfortunately my dad knocked into it prior to me frosting it and he broke the bottom layer-which is why it's very crooked and mangled.

Beach Cake Finished: The birthday candles are the fire pit and the 2 "tiki" torches

Tiny fondant flip flops and beach blanket

The Parrot Cake

I made her take at least a bite of the parrot. (I made cupcakes too, so there was no need to cut the parrot.

Us. After 24 hours of cake making and decorating. Before my shower.