Tuesday, August 03, 2010

This Is Your Life...

There have been several moments over the last week in which I've stopped myself and thought, "How is this my life?" In the past, this question has always come to me in times of sorrow...wondering how I let myself be hurt by a particular type of man or by situations that could have been avoided.

But this time, the question comes to me because of happiness.

I know that I deserve to be happy and I know that I've probably paid my dues-and even probably paid extra dues for other people. But sometimes my life is so good and wonderful I just can't help wondering "How is this my life?"

I have friends here in Boston-friends who love me and care about me and who like spending time with me. They value my friendship. They want me to be around and most of them even tell me they miss me when I'm not. They come to dinner to celebrate my being born and they contact B1 in secret to tell him they made cupcakes to bring so they could sing happy birthday to me.

It's pretty amazing, and it's time like those which make me once again feel very at peace with my decision to move to Boston. It was calling me and somehow I just fit here. And it feels pretty damn good.

And then there's B1...oh, B1. I am amazed daily at the fact that this wonderful, smart, talented and hot man loves ME. He misses me when he's not with me and makes me drink water and Gatorade when I'm sick. He leaves me little notes, puts "Kiss B1" on to-do lists and tells me how pretty I am and how I make him feel. He wants to marry me. He wants to spend his life being in love with me. And I. Am. Amazed.

This weekend did a lot of fun things. Friday we went to dinner with a group of my friends to celebrate my birthday. He joked and laughed right along with everyone and genuinely liked being there. I didn't have to worry about him saying something I'd have to apologize for later or worry that someone wouldn't like him. We just fit so perfectly together that it astounds me that we existed separately before.

Saturday we did house stuff (he cut apart and put back together our box spring!) and Saturday night we went to see a play. He came to see a play with me. Without a fight. And he chose to do this over doing something that he undoubtedly would have enjoyed more. I'm special to him and he lets me know in 1000 different ways, every day.

Sunday we went sailing. B1 has a boat and up until now, I've not been able to go out with him. Life has been very busy and hectic for us lately and Saturday's (the day we both have off together) have been jammed with other things that needed to be done. But Sunday was a beautifully perfect day and I got to spend it with my B1 on his boat. We sailed into Boston Harbor and as we passed George's Island, I thought, "How is this my life?" Who would have thought that I'd be here, in this place, with this man...and how am I so lucky?

I don't know what the answer to that question is...but at this point, I don't really care. A prayer was answered and there he was...and who am I to question that?


LceeL said...

I understand the feeling - the "how am I so lucky?" feeling - but remember this - he feels the same way about you. And in all of this you seem to be losing sight of the fact that YOU are quite a catch - that you are MORE than deserving of someone as loving and caring as he is.

It's not LUCK, Mags. It's just the way things are SUPPOSED to be.

And Miles To Go... said...

I smiled all through this post, Mags. And I smiled even harder when YOU stated "he wants to marry me." I am so incredibly happy that you are happy.

G.W. said...

1. I agree with LceeL that you are a catch and should never forget that. B1 is the lucky one.

2. Beautiful weekend for sailing, nothing is better than being on a boat with the one you love.

3. Just think about how many prayers went unanswered so that this one could be. Amazing.

You smile is becoming contagious

Clancypants said...

Every time I read about your happiness my heart sings for you. For you and B1, because you, indeed, are undoubtedly an equal blessing in HIS life.

Keep those happy posts coming. You are amazing.

Do you remember the dream I had about you? It took a little longer to come to fruition than you might have hoped, but the wait time... the hard time had to be in equal measure to the joy that was on it's way. And it sounds like God delivered.

You make me happy.

Vinny "Bond" Marini said...

I think oyu know I began asking that question myself about 2 years ago...you never stop asking, but the smile on your face gets larger each time you do!

lala [mrs. new guy] said...

what absolutely lovely things are in your life right now. :] makes me smile to think of how happy you are!

Travis Cody said...

I offer this piece of unsolicited advice...enjoy and love your life!

"Lois Grebowski" said...

isn't it awesome?