Saturday, November 22, 2008

The 4th Anniversary of Me

Today is the 4th Anniversary of Me. It might seem silly that I celebrate this day, especially b/c it's been 4 years. It's very important to me though, to remember that even though I have sad, crappy days, I'm ALLOWED to. And most important of all, I'm safe. This is a day to remember that it CAN happen to you-and that you CAN survive. And no matter how much I feel like life sometimes stinks...it's never as bad as it was when I was laying on the steps of my house unable to move my right arm and bleeding from my forehead, not knowing if I'd be able to scam my way into one more day alive. Today is the Anniversary of Me...

From Brokenness to Happiness

From the depths of despair
when my world fell apart
I felt all alone
and heavy in heart -
My life had been shattered
by a tight-fisted hand
Who could I turn to;
who'd understand?

He made me feel worthless
to the depths of my soul
I was just a possession
for him to control -
Always blaming me
whenever things went wrong
Though physical scars heal
emotional live on.

So with no self-esteem
and in a broken mess
I made a decision
about my happiness -
It took all my courage
that I could find
To make a stand for myself
and leave him behind.

Those first few months
were the loneliest I'd been
But I knew it was worth it
not to be hit again -
And in finding myself
I cried a river of tears
Learning to love me
and facing my fears.

Though the memory remains
but the hurt has gone
My scars have all healed
my emotions live on -
Over four years have passed
since I walked out that door -
No need to look back,
no fear anymore.

© Christina
15 August, 2000

13 comments:

Denae said...

Congrats. Enjoy this special day. Enjoy you.

Lois Grebowski said...

I'm so glad that you're you and you're still here...

Congrats on this milestone.
Big hugs!

Melisa said...

Happy Anniversary! I don't think that it's silly to celebrate at all.

Have a great day...hope you have some plans that include something along the lines of a massage or a pedicure... :)

mauniejames3 said...

God love you my poor Mags...that made me cry but some of the tears were for the new and improved you.

Make every day worth it and the love we feel for you, just know how strong that is.

You did an amazing thing...not many of us would have had the courage.

Have an awesome day...even though it's cold out go out and do something FUN

Clancy In Idaho said...

You are incredible! Happy Anniversary, YOU! That is definitely something to celebrate. :)

crazy working mom said...

Big Hugs to you, Mags.

Linda said...

There's nothing silly about having an anniversary of remembrance - this was and is a very important date for you.

Lovely poem.

Travis said...

Of course this is a day to commemorate. I don't think it's silly at all.

Mo said...

Blessings to you and the life you create for YOU!

flipper said...

that made me cry. we're survivers. i love you.

Ivanhoe said...

Oh honey! Am I glad you are away from it now and that you survived.
((hugs))

katherine. said...

not silly to celebrate strength of character...you have taken amazing and wonderful steps in your life.

sending you hugs

Sue said...

Mags, So good for you to get yourself out and remember what a strong great person you are and deserve to be! You should celebrate every day!!!!