One of my friends from Florida is stealing my life. Ok, by stealing, I really mean, living the same horror. We're both punctilious. We both over process. We both heavily weigh the outcome of each scenario before making decisions. We both date people who have trouble defining relationships. You see where this is headed don't you?
Fun. Really, the only difference is that she still gets to work at Walt Disney World and I...well, don't.
She'd been dating a guy for a while and all of a sudden out of the blue...an ice cream talk*!
Now, I don't think she was actually taken out for ice cream, which stinks, because there are many favorable options in Lake Buena Vista-especially Beaches and Cream where you can get "Everything But The Kitchen Sink" served...in a sink, and also Ghiradelli in the Downtown Disney Marketplace. I don't think that she got to partake in these wonderful frosty delights while being dumped, however, making her fall even more terrible.
So, sometimes she'll write to me and it's as if I'd written the letter myself. It's very strange. I'll actually read the email over because I know exactly what she's feeling, it gives me goosebumps.
She's said things like, "I guess I don't know how I really feel about him. We are attracted to each other and have a great time. Sometimes I look at him and think 'I could definitely love this person for ever and ever' and other times I'm like, "Yeah, just kiss me and leave'" Now, I have to stop to say that I've never felt like I wanted Mr. CM to leave when we are together, even when he's in a pissy mood. When I'm with him, I want the time to go on and on and on. But-I can identify with the "I think I want to have your babies" one minute and "Let's just be special friends" the next."
Especially lately. Some days I think I'm getting in way over my head and that I'm falling for him and then the next (literally) I'm thinking, "Yeah, it's ok (and sometimes good) to not be too involved" What is wrong with me? Shouldn't I be completely in love or completely unattached?
Here I go again in another "I want to poke my eyeballs out" kind of stage...
But back to my friend. Her boy said some pretty whacked out things. He first said that he didn't think they had enough chemistry. (Though they'd been dating a while and the chemistry had been there-I mean, really there.) He also said that he didn't like that his friends always asked about her-and that they liked her. (This is just silly. I mean, does he want everyone he knows to hate each other?) Let's see, what else....oh yeah-he wants to leave his options open so he can date other people, but in the next breath he said he didn't want to be dating anyone. What is going on? I bet you he uses the phrase, "It is and it isn't" and stupid things like that.
Can anyone, specifically my male readers, let me in on the secret? What does it sound like to you? Does it sound like he's just not interested anymore and that's why he's saying these things? And if that's the case, why not just say, "We had fun and now it's over"?
On another side note, I've laid the groundwork for a talk with Mr. CM. The work boyfriend was actually typed in an email today. Now-I have to stop most of you from jumping up and down and also from emailing/calling me-I did NOT call him my boyfriend nor did I ask him to be my boyfriend, I simply stated that we never put labels on each other and it sometimes makes me hold back-that's all, nothing more. And, just so you know, nothing was mentioned in the response about it...so, though the groundwork has begun, there's still a lien on the loan of love.
Now...off to gouge out my eyes.
*Ice Cream Talk: Getting taken out for ice cream and then dumped.